Me: Hello (insert name of job here), how may I help you?
Phone: Yes, I’m looking for a travel book on Argentina?
Me: Do you have a title?
Phone: I don’t know, its something about Argentina.
Me: Okay. Do you have an author?
Phone: It’s spelled F-O-O-T-S-C-R-A-Y.
Me: I’m sorry, could you spell that for me one more time?
Phone: (annoyed) its FOOTS. CRAY.
Me: First name?
Phone: Vic. V-I-C.
Catalogue? Nothing. Amazon? Nothing. Google? Aha!
Me: Sir, the book that you’re looking for? That author doesn’t exist.
Phone: it says so in the catalogue.
Me: Yeah, no…Footscray is a suburb of Victoria…major city in Australia.
You really might need to rethink that overseas travel, bruh.