Who Wore It Better: The High Ponytail AKA I Whip My Hair Back and Forth Ed.

I’ve been waiting for weeks for someone to post a gif of this so I can properly do this blog post.

So serious, I emailed myself a daily reminder to look for this image to complete this post.

WHO WORE IT BETTER: The “I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH” ed.

THE PIED PIPER from Sleepy Hollow

PiedPiper2

The Pied Piper from Sleepy Hollow

OR

Ariana Grande

Ariana Grande

No, Willow Smith does not qualify for this competition.

P.S. –

My apologizes if you were expecting anything referencing R. Kelly.

That Awkward Moment…#212b

When you’re at you’re at children’s birthday party

KidBirthday

Yes, when cranked up on soda, ice cream, and other sweets, I do believe children are prone to homicidal tendencies.

And your best friend’s dad is showing you pictures of things in his phone

And he accidentally shows you one

that you’re in

that you never posed for

He tells you that it’s already on Facebook 

then asks if you want it deleted.

 

 

That’s What Friends Aren’t For

Keep smilin’,

keep shining,

knowing you can always count on me…

For sure.

That’s what friends are foooooooooooorrrrrrrrr!

Image

Dionne Warwick, Gladys Knight, Elton John, Stevie Wonder, Burt Bacharach, AND Carol Bayer Sager all lied to me. I’m suing. *dials up Gloria Allred*

They aren’t.

As 2013 winds down, I’ve had a lot of time to reflect on things.

What went great. What didn’t.

Everything in between.

This year was a particularly difficult one, and through that difficulty, I was shown exactly what I meant to people. And I showed too much of what they meant to me.

Admittedly, I had a difficult time grasping, or rather, believing that I had the right to be upset and feel a particular way when I felt the way that I did. As in, my friends, when I absolutely needed them at my worst, did not want commit to their plea of “I’ll be there for anything you need. Just call me.”

I don’t ask for much in friendships, except for to be treated with the same love, care, commitment, faithfulness, truth, and dedication that I provide.

Maybe I’m spoiled because I have sisters.

Then, I thought maybe I was unable to handle the growing pains. And that is part of it, I admit. Being in a dead-end job while everyone else is (or appears to be) flourishing, friends getting married, being disrespected by their newly SO, being ditched for shiny, newer friends, or reacquainted relationships being tainted by manipulative third (turd?) parties. Aside from those vague, yet, autobiographical examples, the growing part that is difficult to come to terms with is the fact that people have a tendency to change for the worse before changing for the better. And when they are in that quagmire of negativity, no matter how much you want to try and keep them the same, it will be a challenge, and damn near impossible, to see that they will ever be who they once were. That is something that will never be altered in human nature.

Not to be a contrarian (Chrome is telling me that term isn’t real, but I know it is. I read books), but I do believe that a person has to weather some storms before they see the sunshine. However, if you keep driving into that storm, thinking that each one will be different, then you’re going to continue getting caught in an ever strengthening tidal wave-tsunami-monsoon hybrid disaster of epic proportions. (Yes, I know all of those things are impossible to happen simultaneously, but work with me here…).

I’d like to be out of the company of people who want to be friends with me when it is convenient for them. And that is mostly due to them attempting to absolve some guilt for screwing me over.

Come 2014, I’m not allowing this to happen anymore. I can’t break my neck, sacrifice my time, for people who cannot understand, or appreciate, the little things that make up a friendship.

A simple “hello” or “I just called to say I love you” (yes, I’m naming more 80’s songs) can make a person’s day, or break it if they can’t fulfill a basic aspect.

Please, do not misconstrue the aforementioned as me being insensitive, or rather, inconsiderate to my friends lives. I think about when other people have things going on — and understand that they aren’t always able to contact me in a timely fashion. And sometimes, they just don’t want to talk. That is absolutely fine. But at least let me know that you’re alive and well. I’d hope they’d do the same for me — because I genuinely do give a shit as to whether or not they’re walking the Earth and are happy. But I honestly believe that my existence is not of any significance to them. That is, not until they need me.

But do me a favor, if I ask you to hang out, and you claim to be broke, don’t be a Dick‘s Sporting Goods and post pictures on Facebook or Instagram two hours later dancing and drinking in a nightclub.

Also, don’t make plans with me and then dump me for a booty call with your boyfriend.

On my birthday.

At that point, do yourself a favor, and go screw yourself.

Happy 2014.

You Look So Professional! Like A French Model!

Now, normally — I wear my hair either like this:

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When it’s in its natural state

Or like this:

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When it’s too damn hot during the summer to deal with it. We’ve also had so much rain, the humidity has been torture on my strands. This makes it easy for a get up and go style.

But one day, I happened to wear my hair like this:

Short-Cut-Hairstyles-for-Black-Women_02

Got it cut recently for the summer and I wanted to straighten it again. I got a new hair dryer and flat iron. It was my excuse to splurge and experiment post haircut.

Now, for some reason, one co-worker has never felt compelled to say anything about my previous hair styles. But this last one, she just felt the need to compliment (backhandedly), informing me that I look “professional” with my hair straightened.

I had to stop myself from having an external moment like this:

To having an internal moment like this:

Despite the fact that I’m pretty much one of two people there who dresses impeccably well, my hair, ignoring it’s neatness, was not professional enough for her on a daily basis. Unless it was straightened.

Fuck you and your hillbilly logic.

Thanks.